In Gratitude to the Lord and His Instruments

A Letter to All Sisters and Brothers

August 13, 1994: This merited the second anniversary of my kidney transplant, a time to remember and thank my Sai Center members and other fellow devotees who rendered extraordinary service to me in the past few years. Two years ago, my brother gave me his kidney. At a time of great pain and anguish, through 17 months of dialysis, the transplant itself and four other surgeries, brothers and sisters from Sai Centers in the New York area and beyond came together in a powerful way to help, support, pray for, and love my family and me. I was awed end overwhelmed by the capacity we human beings have to go beyond our own needs and problems to love end serve one another. On a larger scale, the unity that the love and service inspired among fellow devotees was truly an experience of Divinity. It is hard to express in words the overwhelming impact of such love. Since it is not humanly possible to thank each one of you remarkable souls, here is e letter to the Divine in you:

They told me my kidneys had almost failed and if I didn’t go into hospital, I could die soon. You, my Lord Sai, were there to sustain me. For many months, through intense times, you supported me. As I worried about how to get to and from the hospital across the river with this weary body, you set in motion a wonderful Sai transportation service, the likes of which I had never seen, nor could have imagined.

Twice a week at Your Centers, you asked for volunteers. Three times a week You turned up in Your different names and forms. Three times a week You appeared at my doorstep to take me to hospital. Three times a week You waited for me below the dialysis facility to bring me home. I didn’t know in what form you would appear. I was moved beyond measure that you never failed me.

You made innumerable phone calls to Yourselves, rallying support for me. You made countless contacts with my family and me, showering Your love, compassion, and strength.

You drove me around for days on end, often Yourself wheelchair bound. You shopped for me when I couldn’t move; You sang bhajans for me in Your home when I couldn’t sing. You gave me gifts to cheer me up. You cooked for me, prayed for me, O Lord, did You pray through all yourselves. You kept me alive in that prayer. I had to make it for Your sake, for You in my family, for You in my extended brothers and sisters.

You spent hours making the most heart-warming Swami album for me and filling it with Your love. You created beautiful cards, sent inspiring quotes, delivered balloons and comics, and brought amrit (nectar) and tons of blessed vibhuti (holy ash). You sent me earrings You had materialized, photos You had touched, and a continuous overwhelming stream of love. You calmed my migraines, relieved my body, and hung on to my soul.

You soothed me, consoled me, advised me, scolded me, and taught me. I had no idea of Your Power until You clutched my hands and took my pain. I had no idea of your compassion until You showed up when I needed You.

I must admit that You made me work hard. l often struggled with faith, hope, and despair. You also made me angry, irritated, hurt, and confused. But every time I thought You weren’t listening, when I was just about over the edge, you sent a sign that You knew all, and that You were helping.

My brother and I lay in separate operating theaters with our two teams of doctors. Through those agonizing hours when the organ was rushed from him to me and all held their breath to see if it would work, you were there. You called around, took leave from work, threw open the doors of Your house, and gathered in unprecedented numbers. Some of your forms were not even Sai devotees.

For four hours or more, as we were in operation, you sang bhajans and chanted Divine names. As I came to consciousness hours later in the recovery room, I felt Your deep peace and happiness. Strange, I thought, for one whose body was still in great pain. Glancing at the clock on the wall, I hazily realized that Your prayers must still be on.

Thus You gave me the opportunity to learn about the love You have placed in all Your forms, in all humans, in our boundless capacity to go beyond ourselves and give love, the love that is beyond words, the love that consoles, heals, and cures. Please help us to always remember this gift of Yours in us.

For teaching me about love and faith and miracles, Lord Sai, I am deeply grateful. To You, the motivator of all my magnificent brothers and sisters, I pay my homage. To You in my family members, there are no words at all to convey my feelings of gratefulness. So dear Swami, today and every day, I pray for Your special grace to fill the lives of all Your wonderful instruments of Love.

V.S., New York City