Loving Care

In the following article Ms. S. D. Krystal from Pacific Palisade, a long time devotee of Bhagavan Baba, shares her experience with Swami, who protects His devotees like a loving and caring mother. We may feel that Swami is far away, but He is never far from His children when they need Him.

On July 14, I woke up remembering the tail-end of a very vivid dream. In it, I was one of a group of people waiting to be tested by judges, but I didn’t know the nature of the test. When my turn came, the judges said, with surprise, that “this one,”—meaning me—was able to breathe the full breath. Apparently this was the test. I remember being very surprised since I do not practice pranayama [breath control] and I had not been aware of breathing any differently than usual.

Shortly after waking, my husband Sidney and I started our usual morning routine of Tai Chi [Chinese exercises], followed by the meditation according to Baba’s suggestions in the guidelines.

A few minutes after starting Tai Chi, I was very strongly aware of Baba standing in front of me a short distance away. I was most impressed with the fact that though I did not actually see him, I knew the space he occupied in the room. I also knew his size and height compared to my own.

Then I noticed that he was literally pouring into my solar-plexus what felt like energy and I was amazed at how easy it was for me to relax and breathe it in. I wondered why it had never seemed so easy before. I hoped that I could continue to be this open to receiving from him. I didn’t connect this with the dream until later.

I had awakened with a headache, so I thought Baba must be helping me with that. I thanked him. The awareness of Baba continued throughout the exercises and on into the meditation until I began to feel that Baba was inside of me and that his energy was circulating throughout my body with a tingling sensation. I did not mention this to Sidney at the time because it was such a subjective experience.

After breakfast, I took a shower in the bathroom that Sidney always uses.  I didn’t use the shower in my bathroom because the walls were being painted. When I stepped out of the shower, Sidney stepped in. A second later I heard a crash as he slipped on the tile and fell on his back across the tile steps. He lay inert, groaning, and unable to breathe or to speak.

Since Baba’s presence was still so strong inside me, it was natural for me to call on Him for help. Somehow I managed to move Sidney out of the shower and onto a mat on his stomach. I was horrified to see that his rib-cage on the right side was caved in. There were two red marks across his back and black and blue bruises beginning to appear on his upper back.

I quickly got Vibhuti [holy ash] and the mangalasutra [sign of marriage among the Hindus] which Baba had materialized at the spiritual marriage he gave us last year. Putting them on Sidney’s back, I started to rub him gently with the Vibhuti, massaging it in as I talked out loud to Baba, asking for help.

I was profoundly moved as I watched the ribs move up under my hand and the upper back resume its normal shape. Then Sidney gasped air in and was able to breathe and speak again.

As I continued to rub the Vibhuti into the injured area, the black and blue bruises began to fade as if they were being washed away. I could feel the broken ribs move under my hand and could hear the broken ends rub against one another. Subsequent x-rays showed that three ribs had been broken.

The amazing part is that there was no puncture of the lung. The broken ends were close together so that it was not necessary to operate to pull them into place. There were also no bruises visible.

I feel certain that Baba must have known that this was about to happen, but, as he has said, he will not interfere with our karma. He prepared me ahead of time (without my knowing the reason) so that I would be alert to call on him for help immediately. I was already filled with his energy so that it could pour into Sidney to prevent the accident from being more serious than it was.

The chief reason I am sharing this is that so many devotees think that as soon as they come to Baba they will live happily ever after, free from problems, just as in the fairy stories we heard as children. Many devotees are deeply disappointed and disillusioned, and often begin to doubt Baba when troubles come. They appear to be under an attack with barely enough time to recover from dealing with one problem before new ones loom up.

Baba has told us that he often accelerates our karma when we come to him. As he will not erase it, he helps us handle it if we call on him, knowing we cannot deal with it alone.

In the experience I have just shared, not only did he fill me with his presence, but he led me, (without my knowledge) to be right there, only inches away when Sidney fell. If I had been anywhere else in the house, he might not have survived, since his condition made it impossible for him to call me. I could not have heard the fall with the bathroom door closed.

For me, it is more realistic to know that Baba is always available to help us with our problems, rather than to expect him to wave a magic wand and avert them—thereby taking away the chance for us to learn the necessary lessons we gain through handling difficulties with his help.

I am filled with awe as I look back and realize the loving care He showed by coming ahead of the accident to prepare the way in order to lessen its severity.

~Ms. S. D. Krystal, Pacific Palisade
Source: Sanathana Sarathi, September 1976