Devotion & Darshan

Devotee: How can we progress in devotion?

Sai Baba: There are different modes of devotion: that which foolishly weeps for Me when I am not physically present; that which surrenders to Me with wild abandon; and that which is steady and strong, ever attached to My will. I accept all these forms of devotion. The choice between one or the other is not yours, for it is I who rules your feelings and modifies them. If you try to go where I do not will, I will stop you; you can do nothing apart from My will. Be assured of that; this is the highest devotion.

Devotee: So, what remains for me to do?

Sai Baba: What makes you think that “doing” is so important? Be equal-minded. Then you will not be bothered about “doing” or “not-doing,” success or failure; the balance will remain unaffected by either. Let the wave of memory, the storm of desire, the fire of emotion pass through without affecting your equanimity. Be a witness of these. Commitment engenders holding, narrowing, limiting. Be willing to be nothing. Let all dualities subside in your neutrality.

Devotee: Yes, Baba. But when it’s pain that one has to endure…

Sai Baba: Do you think that I would confront you with pain were there not a reason for it? Open your heart to pain, as you do now for pleasure, for it is wrought by Me for your good. Welcome it, as a challenge. Do not turn away from it. Do not listen to your mind, for mind is but another word for “need.” The mind engenders need; it manifested as this world, because it needed this. It is all My plan; to drive you by the pangs of unfulfilled need to listen to My voice, which when heard, dissolves the ego and the mind with it.

Devotee: I crave for Your darshan ever. Tell me where to go to and when.

Sai Baba: I want you to pass beyond these criteria and wait in readiness, and yet with uncertainty. Location is limitation; let events manifest themselves. Be willing to be led by Me as I choose.

Devotee: But being so full of defects, how can we rise up to those high expectations?

Sai Baba: Your deficiencies make you need Me, and curb the arrogance of your mind. They are there on purpose, as instruments to prod you on. Through them I am making you want Me. The feeling of separation is just a trick of your mind. You form conclusions; they become beliefs, they shape your activities and attitudes.

Devotee: It’s hard to undergo your tests.

Sai Baba: It is like baking a cake. I stir, I knead, I pound, I twist, I bake you. I drown you in tears; I scorch you in sobs. I make you sweet and crisp, an offering worthy of God. I have come to reform you. My plan is to transmute you into a successful sadhaka (spiritual aspirant). I won’t leave you until I do that. Even if you stray away before you become that, I will hold on to you. You cannot escape from Me.

Devotee: You are so compassionate.

Sai Baba: There is nothing I do not see, nowhere I do not know the way. My sufficiency is unconditional, independent of everything. I am the totality of it.

Devotee: How then can we aspire for Your grace?

Sai Baba: I do not ask for perfect concentration or full renunciation. I ask only for love, love that sees Me and serves Me in all beings. I ask only that you turn to Me when your mind drags you into grief, pride, or envy. Bring me the depths of your mind, no matter how grotesque, how cruelly ravaged by doubts or disappointments. I know how to treat them. I will not reject you. I am your mother. No matter where you go, I am there. I can work with you everywhere.

Devotee: I clamor for darshan but You ask me to leave for my home across the seas.

Sai Baba: Those who think I am this outer form need Me far more than you do. Their faith is more insecure, and often not at all. Their confusion arises from the habit of their mind depending on external conditions, and drawing its sense of security from those external conditions.

Devotee: Baba, however inadequate, I ask just this boon: make me Your instrument.

Sai Baba: All are My instruments. Perhaps you believe that I choose: this one is good, that one is worse, etc. No. Either will do. My will is the source of all that is and happens, it penetrates every thing and every act; it includes everything. Finally let Me tell you this: My will is that you should manifest My will in you and through you.”

Source: Sanathana Sarathi, August 1974
Sai Baba: the Holy Man and the Psychiatrist