The Agni Pariksha

Bhagavan Sri Sathya Sai Baba has opened schools and colleges to impart education to young boys and girls. In the following article, a student shares his experience of undergoing Baba’s tests when he is home for the holidays. The title of the story means: ‘Test by Fire’.

So, you are from Puttaparthi, are you?” For the 100th time I winced, and I made a mental note to tell my mother not to tell everyone that I was from Parthi. I told the gentle-man, “Yes, Sir, I am.” “Well, then, would you like to tell us something about the place, how it runs…?” And so it went on.

The conversation might sound insignificant to some. But to Sathya Sai students, this is an agni pariksha or an ordeal by fire—the test to determine one’s moral standard as shaped by the Lord. Of course, one cannot engage in the unholy task of categorizing those who fail in this test as “untrue” Sathya Sai students. There might be several reasons for a person’s failure to live up to Sai ideals at a crucial moment. Sai’s ideals are the highest, and considering the world from which we all have come to Parthi, it is obvious that we need time and patience to see the day when a student can proudly say that he is a Sathya Sai student without being afraid of behaving otherwise.

Testing time

Students look forward to holidays so that we can go back to our parents. At the same time, we are not happy at the prospect of leaving Parthi. The moment the bus leaves Parthi, it is as if some part of our being is left behind. This feeling invariably has an effect on our behavior, the extent of which depends directly on how far we have been able to grasp and absorb our Lord’s teachings. For some, holidays are not just a stretch of days to enjoy, but a period of severe trial in which their degree of absorption of the Lord’s ideals is tested.

There are three types of people we are likely to come across in the world out-side, viz., (i) those who seem genuinely interested in us and wish to know all about Bhagavan Baba, (ii) those who are just not bothered, and (iii) those who want to know more for the purpose of criticism and ridicule. Most of us students would undoubtedly like to move about with people belonging to the first category and would not mind meeting a few of the second. But, we definitely prefer to keep away from the third. With all three types of people, however, one will undergo the above mentioned agni pariksha.

How does this work? The people in the first category have some regard for us. At any word of disparagement from us, they begin to revise their opinions about us. Hence, one has to succeed in the test with them. Regarding the second category of persons, who are uncommitted in their opinion, it is just enough if one speaks the right words that will tilt their opinion more to the brighter side. As for the third category, most of us cannot do any-thing. If they refuse to acknowledge the Lord’s presence, then we should remember that they are to be pitied rather than shunned.

Most of us have seen Swami constantly urging us to go home for the holidays. How many of us readily realize that He is sending us into the testing crucible—the place where we are tested for the qualities we have imbibed at Prasanthi Nilayam? But there is nothing to worry. If we just think about Swami and call on His help at such times of test, we may be sure He is there. This is my personal experience.

Cynic turned devotee

I have an uncle who is very much of a cynic and casts doubts on everything. I always dreaded the prospect of encountering him and becoming the target of his bombardment. One day what I feared happened. He dropped in at our home and said, “Ah! How is your Puttaparthi?” I muttered within myself, “Oh Bhagavan!” and said, “Fine, uncle.”

Then followed a fusillade of questions and I answered them all in monosyllables, until I met my mother’s disapproving frown. And then I saw Swami frowning that way. I knew then that I must stop my uncle’s tirade. I fervently prayed to Bhagavan and started answering my uncle’s questions with more fire and punch in them. I even found myself plunging him into thoughtful silence now and again.

I felt very proud of this achievement, though I never took the credit for it. It was only later that I realized that Swami had been with me at that time. I knew this when I heard my uncle tell my father, “Sai (referring to me) has matured quite a lot! I have never heard such an argument from him!” It was four weeks later that I got a letter from him in which he expressed his desire to come to Parthi!

Hence, Sai students need not get panicky at the thought of holidays. Of course, we should remember to have iron control over ourselves when we go home for the holidays. Knowingly or unknowingly, there are a thousand eyes watching our every move, and as many mouths to spread the word. Let us bravely go forward and face our agni pariksha with the same zest and zeal that we show to the enjoyment part of our holidays. Let us remember the joy that we would give our Lord if we come out with flying colors in this test. Let that joy in His eyes and our satisfaction at that be our guiding light to our goal.

~M. Sainath, III B.Sc., Vidyagiri
Source: Sanathana Sarathi, April 1988