Mastery of Senses

There is a method by which the demands of the senses can be reconciled and harmonized. This is by treating both good and bad with equal mindedness. Tukaram [a saint] is an illustrious example in this regard. He was a great devotee and very gentle by nature. His wife was a shrew. Nevertheless, by his calmness and forbearance, Tukaram managed to get on well with her. Only when one is in the habit of retaliating word for word, tit for tat, tooth for tooth, and nail for nail, one has to face discord and trouble. But Tukaram was the very embodiment of forbearance. He used to cultivate his small farm of half-an-acre to maintain his family.

At the instance of his neighbors, he once raised sugarcane crop on that small plot of land. When the crop was mature taking undue advantage of Tukaram’s good nature, many passers-by used to pluck a couple of sugarcanes and chew them. Finally, Tukaram harvested whatever crop was left behind, bundled the canes and was taking them home in his cart. On the way, the children of the village gathered round him and pleaded for a piece of sugarcane each. In his usual generosity, Tukaram allowed the children to help themselves to the canes in the cart. At last when he reached home, there was only one cane left in the cart.

Seeing this, his wife flew into a rage and strongly scolded Tukaram, condemning him as unfit for family  life, she took out the only cane on the cart in a fit of anger and struck Tukaram with it. The cane broke into three pieces, out of which two fell on the ground, and the other was in her hand. Tukaram calmly remarked, “I was wondering all along the way as to how to distribute the single remaining cane to the three members of the family. I am glad you have nicely solved the problem for me. You can eat one piece that is in your hand, and give the other two that have fallen on the floor to the two children.” Such forbearance and equanimity can rarely be found except in a few high-souled people. These qualities can be acquired only through devotion and faith. You need not feel disheartened with the fear that you will not be able to control the senses. By developing one-pointed devotion and complete surrender to God, the senses can definitely be brought under control.

Kabir [another saint] is an example of another godly man in a different situation. Unlike Tukaram’s wife, Kabir’s wife was highly devoted and faithful, totally dedicated to serving the husband and obeying him implicitly. One day Kabir was plying his handloom, chanting as usual, the name of “Rama” all the time. Suddenly he called his wife, saying that one thread has snapped, and asked her to bring a lamp. It was noon and when she brought the lightened lamp, Kabir asked her to take it back as it was not necessary (because of daylight). Any other wife in her position would have retorted, saying, “Have you no eyes to see the daylight? Why did you waste my time and effort by unnecessarily asking me to bring a lighted lamp and to take it back? Do you think I have no other work?” etc. But Kabir’s wife was made of a different stuff. She silently took back the lamp, without a murmur or uttering even a single word of resentment. Hence, with such a dutiful and obedient wife, Kabir was able to develop his devotion unhampered, and expressed his gratitude to God for His grace in giving him such a god partner in life.

Here you have two examples of saintly men, who despite their contrasting family situation pursued their spiritual path equally well. Hence, it is not the environment that matters in the control of one’s senses and emotions. It is the purity of one’s impulses, sincerity of purpose, and determination in treading the divine path that count rather than the environment which is of little or no consequence in this regard.

Source: Summer Showers 1990, Indian Culture and Spirituality, Pp. 44-46